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Make Your Values Clear, Then Listen to Her You might want your daughter to wait until she’s married.
You might think sex is OK after a certain age, or in the context of a loving, committed relationship.
“An early love relationship can be a laboratory for how to be in a healthy relationship,” says Kantor. With a good dose of mutual respect and communication, they can learn about romance together.
If Your Daughter is Sexually Active, Stay Involved A lot of parents make the mistake of walking away when they realize their daughter is having sex.
“Most kids want to please their parents,” says Ilana Amrani-Cohen, LICSW, Ph D, director of the Families with Voices program at The Guidance Center in Cambridge, Mass.
“If they see their parent getting upset, they’ll clam up.” While fear and anxiety can make some moms go overboard, it prevents others from saying enough.
What they did tell her, by way of rolling eyes, was that they didn’t want to talk about it. Your daughter already has some ideas about sex, for better or worse.
As a parent, this is one of those opportunities to help your daughter learn through experience. Remind her that both she and the object of her affection are young.Kantor, who is also an assistant professor at the Mailman School of Public Health at Columbia University, suggests using things that happen in your daughter’s everyday life to check in.For instance: Even if your daughter resists your attempts, don’t give up. “Trust that your main message is getting through.” Do Some Soul Searching Sex is a loaded topic at any age.If you have mixed feelings about your past or current sex life, do your best to come to terms with that before you talk to your daughter.Your best intentions will fall flat if you come across as upset, afraid, or downright angry when you talk about sex.